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| I have a wedding to go to tomorrow. I'm excited for my friend, the bride.
But I'm not excited cause that guy i talked about in my last post and his new fiance will be there too. I SO do not want to see them making eyes at each other during the wedding. I just know they'll be thinking... that will be us in a few months...
this could suck.
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| The man of my dreams, who i've fallen in love with over the past 12 years is now engaged... to someone else.
This time last year he wasn't even dating!
I feel like hell. My heart was literally ripped to shreds and trampled on.
I think the best part... this saturday he's coming with me to help with my other friends wedding. So he just get's engaged to NOT ME and now i have to spend time with him at a WEDDING!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Most people, when they break up, have a time in there life BEFORE that person that they can go back to and start to rebuild there life. Well I don't have that. He's been such a big part of my life for so long. There is NOTHING before him.
It's like I have to totally reinvent my life. I don't know now if i'm the way i am today because of my dream of a life with him, or if this is really me and he had nothing to do with it.
I feel like i have nothing to go back to, i don't know who i am, my heart is bleeding. I need to leave this place, this town, this state. GET OUT! He was the last thing tying me here and now he's gone.
I just want a guy who loves and respects me... THAT'S IT! Some to say to me, "I'm here now, you never have to be sad and alone again"
If a person could die from a broken heart... well... i'm surprised i'm still alive.
I'm so hurt, I can't even cry. 
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| Hey, everyone! I'm sorry It's been so long since I've been on here but I've been working on... not hating my self anymore. I'm actually doing things right now. Eating healthy, working out right. I've gotten closer to God and I actually like myself more. I still hate the way my body looks but now it's changing. Soon I'll have a beautiful HEALTHY body and I'll feel good about myself through the journey and after i'm there.
I'll be changing the look of my page soon to reflect a new chapter of health in my life. I'll also be deleting the super skinny chick pictures I used to post. I will however, still be posting inspirational pictures of healthy bodies to keep me on track and motivated.
I've been playing the ana game of failed weight loss, self hate, cutting, pain and depression for close to 8 years now. I'm gonna 25 in less then a month and I have no life to show for it. Today start the first day of health, fitness, beauty and love.
Today is the first day of the rest of my life. 
~ Lacy
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| hi everyone, sorry it's been so long since i've posted. i had been doing very well for a while. i was getting away from ana... recovering i guess. i was eating healthy and going to the gym. just when i start to think it may finally be over, ana comes back. it's different this time almost like i don't even notice that i've stopped eating again until my belly growls. like this time it's not me fighting ana, this time it's me AND ana. she never really left. that whole time she stayed dormant in me growing stronger i guess. i don't even want to fight her this time, i don't feel i have to. maybe i'm in denial. like i said... it's different.
i've adopted a more vegetarian diet. would anyone be willing to share some good vegetarian recipes?
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| hi girls, It's been a while since i've even been on this site let along posted something. I had been getting better. I talked to someone about some things. It was a friend that i told but it was so hard and then things got weird so i stopped talking, haha. so i've been getting "better". I've been eating normal and i joined planet fitness. I think i'll really like it there. everyone is so nice and helpful.
everything was going well untill THE MAN OF MY DREAMS SHATTERED MY HEART!!!!!
we've been best friends for ever. we know each other so well. our friendship is one that
could move into the relationsip stage at any second. Well, he has a girlfriend now.
it's my falt for getting my heart so wrapped around him knowing full well that we
were just friends and he could at anytime find someone. at any rate, i've been trying to put
my heart back together again and in the process i've been thinking about forgetting the
whole "getting better" thing and just..... get sick. It takes so much.
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